Kentucky Football — Beach Bowl Prediction

Beach Bowl Prediction—By John Huang

Hattiesburg, Mississippi, lies a scant 77 miles from the serene blue waters of the Gulf of Mexico. Prior to covering Kentucky’s road opener, my plans were to spend a few sun-splashed days on the Biloxi beaches preparing my perilous prognostication for the upcoming Wildcat season. Perhaps some glorious sunrises, an abundance of succulent seafood, and a few well-timed luscious libations could conjure up an idyllic vision of how this UK football season will eventually materialize.


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Remember, this isn’t your father’s long-suffering Kentucky football team—where dreams of a successful campaign lie in the smoldering ashes of a season opening upset loss to an inferior opponent. Sure, it’s on the road and it’ll be a thousand degrees on the field, but the Wildcats will somehow squeak out a win over Southern Miss in another Shannon Dawson revenge classic.

Kentucky returns home the following week to celebrate the baptism of Kroger Field with an easy victory over EKU. Too many X’s and O’s combined with too many Jimmys and Joes will send the Colonels back to Richmond in an awkward looking blowout.

Cosmic Karma strikes the Cats as South Carolina breaks a three-game losing streak and upsets Kentucky in a blackout thriller in Columbia. The “Jake Bentley for Heisman” campaign begins here as the Gamecock’s star quarterback goes ballistic against a beleaguered Kentucky defense.

One week later, it’s Cosmic Karma again, but this time in a good way as Kentucky finally breaks the three-decade old losing streak against the Florida Gators. After all, no one beats my alma mater 31 years in a row! It’s a signature win for Coach Mark Stoops, setting the stage for a colossal six-game winning streak as the Cats roll over the likes of Eastern Michigan, Missouri, Mississippi State, Tennessee, Ole Miss, and Vanderbilt in the upcoming weeks. An emphatic win over the Vols will send Butch Jones’ hot seat past the proverbial boiling point as the Wildcats sizzle their way up the top 25.

A date against the powerful Georgia Bulldogs between the hedges in Sanford Stadium will cool things off a bit. Georgia prevails, knocking Kentucky out of first place in the SEC eastern division and silencing any talk by the Wildcat faithful for a return trip to Atlanta for the SEC championship game.

In a bit of a hangover from the disappointing Georgia setback, Kentucky falls the following week to their bitter in-state rivals. Louisville takes the Governor’s Cup as the Wildcats finish their regular season with two crushing defeats.

If my calculations are correct, that still means nine wins and three losses—good enough for a New Year’s Day Bowl game somewhere close to the beach. As I’m sitting here with the sun on my face and my toes in the sand, I’m definitely feeling it. Surf’s up. You heard it here first!

John Huang is a columnist for Nolan Group Media. He can be reached at www.Huangswhinings.com or follow him on Twitter @KYHuangs.